Past Pages

Cleaning out my closet, I came across some pages I had cut out of my journal not too long ago. I propped myself against the wardrobe to read through these carefully folded pages. Curiosity turned to amusement, all tinged with a dash of sadness and yearning. I put those away into the recesses of my heart, as carefully folded as the pages I had just discovered.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath once I had finished. Those words had unearthed a few unpleasant memories that I had thought long gone. The phantom pain threatened to take over my being as I pushed myself onto my knees and continued packing my books away into the half-full box that lay open before me. I blankly threw books from my shelves into it as the words I had just read flew in circles. How naive I had been, not to mention foolish.

I felt the old anger rising up steadily inside. No, never again, I thought. I jumped up, grabbed the sheets of paper and walked out the door to the nearest stone bin with a box of matches in the other hand. I held the pages up as I quickly struck a match and let the flames lick the corners before throwing the match away. I silently gloated as the flames quickly consumed the wretched pieces of paper filled with self-loathing and ungodly yearning. My cheeks were moist and my nose runny but I felt determination welling up inside, squashing the unwelcome visitors in my emotional space.

It's going to be a new day tomorrow.